It seems that my summer of discontent and illness is not yet over.
About two weeks ago I felt a sharp pain in my chest, like I had gotten smashed with a brick in the solar plexus. I let it ride, figuring as I so often do that that which does not kill me only makes me stronger.
As I predicted the pain went away in about three days. I even participated in a 5K race and generally ran around like a Banshee.
However Tuesday night the pain was back and back with a vengeance. Not only was I in pain I was short of breath and disoriented. Rather than walking across the park yesterday morning, I took the bus. That's how out of it I felt.
I finally got in to see my doctor around 1 yesterday. He ran, and what doctor doesn't, a battery of tests. He bled me. EKG'd me. Blood pressured me. And listened to me breathe. Breathing hurts right now. Like I said I feel as if I've gotten smashed in the solar plexus.
After the requisite poking he pronounced that I had pericarditis. To my ears that sounded like something I'd order at a Mexican restaurant. "Pericarditis with carne asado, por favor," I might say. But it turns out pericarditis is a swelling of the membrane that surrounds the heart.
It's more painful than dangerous. But it does wake one up to one's own mortality.
My doctor prescribed some meds--some of the same meds I was on during the summer, and hopefully the pain and discomfort will begin to ebb. But so far, I am running on empty. I made it to work through sheer force of will. And the 43 steps up from the C-train to the street were enervating.
The agency world we live in today is a cruel one. There is no compassion. No one to wish you well, to take it easy. When I was hospitalized over the summer, the agency sent not a single note. In fact, though my wife and I probably have 25 years combined tenure at Interpublic, there wasn't a thing, not a smidgeon of reassurance.
If agencies treat their employees this way (often while claiming to be in 'relationship marketing,') do we really believe for a second that they really give a rat's ass about a client's business outside of the money it generates.
No. These are cold, brutal and inhuman places who care nothing about the people who make them wealthy.
I must say this about the agency I work for: After I was hospitalized, they not only sent over meals to my home every day, they also hired a nurse to visit and check up every other day. Of course, this is the only agency out of the 10 I've worked for that would ever do something like that.
ReplyDeletehope you are feeling better
ReplyDeleteSorry you're feeling so awful; is it really too much to expect to have an employer who gives a s**t? Who understands the power of the goodwill dividend that comes from picking up talent when it's on the floor? Get well soon.
ReplyDelete