My last post of the year. Unless...

My last 2020 post unless...

• Mark Read misplaces another half-a-billion dollars
  .
• Or WPP hires someone over 40.
• Or 30.
• Or actually hires a creative person--not yet another C-level figurehead.
• Or hires a woman.
• Or a person of color.
• Or wins an account with five-figure revenue. Or four. All to the left of the decimal point.
• Or Mark Read buttons his shirt. Or buys a tie.
• Or issues a comprehensible statement about being part of culture or cart of pulture whichever comes first.    
• An agency's offices are as nice as the Holding Company's offices.
• An agency doesn't downsize to lower their rent.

My last post of the year. Unless...

• Marcel gives me something to write about.
• Michelle shows up with something to say.
• Someone pronounces Publicis so it doesn't sound dirty.
• Arthur makes a video that is under ten minutes long.
• Someone doesn't come up with a new, cheaper, uglier production model.

My last post of the year. Unless...

• Humaning takes off.
• A holding company decides creative people are worth holding onto.
• Oreo comes out with a Cole Porter cookie.
• Someone runs a print ad.
• With copy.
• That's over 12 words long.

My last post of the year. Unless...

• A media person does something really funny that doesn't involve the men's room.
• An award is given for an ad that's made a material difference in a client's business.
• A case-study video is produced that contains some truth.
• A Brazilian agency produces real work for a client that's paid real money for it based on a real brief.

My last post of the year. Unless...

• Someone succinctly and intelligently explains what brands were doing before they were customer-centric.
• Or totals up how many CEOs are currently receiving paychecks from Ogilvy.
• Or Martin Sorrell is hanged for having destroyed the industry through his innate "teddy-bear-ness," $100 million annual paychecks and $300 million net worth.
• There's a new Kars 4 Kids commercial without pink guitars.
• A holding company executive issues a statement without using the phrase "an unprecedented new normal."

My last post of the year. Unless...

• The industry pivots.
• Or does something brave.
• Agile.
• Or unprecedented.

That's all the story-scaping from me for 2020.

See you on Jabberuary 4th.

Unless...