Friday, February 23, 2024

Bad News. Worse News.



BAD NEWS: You've gotten Covid again.

WORSE NEWS: It's Covid 19--as in your 19th time.


BAD NEWS: You've gotten hired by a WPP agency.

WORSE NEWS: You harken back to the 2000s.


BAD NEWS: Bagels in the break room.

WORSE NEWS: Stale.


BAD NEWS: The client loves your copy.

WORSE NEWS: She loves it in seven colors of contradictory direction.


BAD NEWS: Verizon is offering a free phone.

WORSE NEWS: You had to watch an entire Verizon commercial to find out about it.


BAD NEWS: You work for the industry's second most-awarded agency network.

WORSE NEWS: Every other agency network is tied for first.


BAD NEWS: You worked for months and won a giant piece of new business.

WORSE NEWS: You worked for months and won a giant piece of new business.


BAD NEWS: Your new CCO has a really crappy creative reputation and a terrible reel.

WORSE NEWS: She didn't do any of the work attributed to her.


BAD NEWS: Your new CCO has a really crappy creative reputation and a terrible reel.

WORSE NEWS: Her replacement will arrive soon and will be even less qualified.


BAD NEWS: Upper management has decreed you have to be in the office three days a week.

WORSE NEWS: Unfortunately they're the same three days upper management is in the office.


BAD NEWS: Upper management has decreed you have to be in the office three days a week.

WORSE NEWS: There's no place to sit.


BAD NEWS: The holding company expense system is so complicated at takes three weeks to do your expenses.

WORSE NEWS: They'll be approved just three weeks after you get charged a credit card late fee.


BAD NEWS: The client is on Net 120.

WORSE NEWS: After taxes, your net is gross.


BAD NEWS: The agency has a new podcast.

WORSE NEWS: You're expected to listen to it.


BAD NEWS: The global holding company town hall discusses nothing but data.

WORSE NEWS: For a moment it seemed like you understood what they were saying.


BAD NEWS: Five years until you retire.

WORSE NEWS: You're only 27.




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