Friday, September 20, 2024

Twenty Questions Pitch Consultants Never Ask but Should.

As a life-long denizen of the ad industry, I've never seen the industry in such a parlous state. The work we do seems more and more inconsequential. It seems less and less important to the people who pay for it or who nominally are supposed to be paying attention to it. And while the industry contracts, it seems bent on awarding itself while it fades away. 

Yet none of this is talked about, much less addressed. And when there is a pitch, pitch consultants seem to guide agencies from same-old to new same-old, perpetuating our demise. 

What if we chose new agencies differently? What if we thought about the business--and what it's meant to do in a way that was liberating, not vise-like.

Nah. Collect your bonus. And your grift.




  1. What is your agency's attrition rate?

  2. What percentage of your creative department has more than five years of advertising experience?

  3. What percentage of people who attend pitch meetings wind up working on the businesses they pitch?

  4. How many people stay with your agency more than three years?

  5. How many clients stay with your agency more than three years?

  6. What is the average number of agency people you bring to a client meeting?

  7. What is the percentage of people in your agency over 50?

  8. How does that jibe with the Inclusion part of DEI?

  9. What is the ratio between CEO pay and the pay of your median employee?

  10. How does that jibe with the Equity part of DEI?

  11. Most often you're hired to help clients grow. By what percentage is your business growing?

  12. Do your executives have offices and your workers sit out in the open like 99-percent of all other employees?

  13. How many CEOs does your agency employ, please count all your constituent parts?

  14. How many Presidents does your agency employ, please count all your constituent parts?

  15. How many CCOs does your agency employ, please count all your constituent parts?

  16. How many agencies a year does your agency purchase?

  17. How many people do you employ today versus five years ago?

  18. What is your revenue today versus five years ago?

  19. What percentage of your creative department is freelance?

  20. Do you have more project managers than people actually doing the projects purportedly in need of management?

  21. What is your agency most proud of?

  22. What percentage of your employees deal with the "Sunday Scaries"?

  23. When was the last time one of your employees had a good day?

  24. When was the last time one of your employees got a raise by not threatening to quit?


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