Some thoughts on social media.

1. ·      When someone says something is “hilarious” it isn’t.
2. ·      Things that “will change everything” won’t.
3. ·      Every video, even those that are around 30-seconds are about a minute too long.
4. ·      If your life is so interesting, in god’s name why are you posting so much.
5. ·      Why am I friends with so many people who can’t spell?
6. ·      Statements like “Nothing is impossible, even the word itself says ‘I’m possible’” are usually ungrammatical and always stupid.
7. ·      The update with the least consequence gets the most likes.
8. ·      Social media is usually done all alone.
9. ·      Most people expressing outrage online have no idea of the real issues.
10. ·      Disney World isn’t any more interesting when someone else goes there.
11. ·      I will never care when someone—especially your kid, scores a goal.
12. ·      Anyone who announces the death of a loved one online should be in therapy.
13. ·      Most cool “never-before-seen” film techniques were done better in the 1930s.
14. ·      Old girl friends aren’t as pretty as they used to be.
15. ·      Old girl friends aren’t as sane as they used to be.
16. ·      You don’t have enough talent to shoot a chocolate cannoli so it looks appetizing.