Once again I am in a shitty mood.
I've been buffeted (that does not mean I'm eating at a buffet) by a battery of small thinking. We can't do x, y or z. That would be so much work.
So we fold up our tent, shake our heads and, I suppose the mature amongst us, 'move on.'
I've been thinking, as I often do when I'm in a shitty mood of a dialogue between the Malloy brothers in "On the Waterfront."
Charlie (Rod Steiger): You're getting on. You're pushing 30.
You know, it's time to think about getting some ambition.
Terry (Marlon Brando): I always figured I'd live a bit longer without it.
It seems to me that everyone these days is a bit like Terry Malloy. Punch drunk. Beaten. Sold out, taking dives for the "short end money."
I'll tell you something.
I'm not good at moving on.
I suck at it.
I don't like laziness, lethargy and lassitude.
I don't like people who can rationalize anything and therefore rationalize everything.
People who smile and say, "well, look on the bright side. We didn't sell our commercial--but we sold the idea of doing commercials."
That's an over-arching philosophy of under-achievement.
That's not maturity.
I don't mind failing.
I do mind accepting it.