Measurement.

Yesterday I had one of those horribly enervating meetings. Not the kind that make you question why you persist in the industry. The kind that make you wonder why assisted suicide is illegal.

We were discussing, in all its glorious banality, an integrated campaign. How will we apply measurement to each of the channels we're in?

I kept saying we can't apply measurement until we know what each communication is meant to do. You cannot rate the efficiency of a garden hose if you think it exists to make a pie crust.

Yes, that's right, people kept jabbering. But how will we measure it?

It was a beautiful sunny day in New York yesterday. The previous months of humidity had dissipated and there was even a slight touch of autumn in the air. Even so, we went around and around like this for about three hours, talking about measurement when we don't know what we're measuring for.

We do so much, it seems to me, so much pseudo-science that's meant to bring us success. And all of that pseudo-science isn't, in the real world, worth a bucket of warm spit.

If you want your marketing to be successful, forget pseudo-science. And look to successful brands. Learn from what they do. Copy it. Do it.

And while we're on the subject of learning, learn this: Success costs money. There are very few brands and very few people who can get by on good looks alone.