Two days in the life.

1. IN THE CHAIN DRUGSTORE.

CUSTOMER: Hi. Do you have safety pins?

CLERK: (NOT LOOKING UP. ASKS COWORKER) Do we have safety pins?

COWORKER: (TURNING PAGE OF MAGAZINE SHE'S READING.) Aisle ten.

CUSTOMER: Aisle ten? Where? It's a big aisle.

COWORKER: On the right side.

CUSTOMER: The right side facing the front of the store or the right side facing the back of the store?

COWORKER: In the back.

CUSTOMER: (FIVE MINUTES LATER) I can't find them.

CLERK: We must be out.

--

2. IN THE CHAIN HOLDING COMPANY AGENCY.

CLIENT: No one knows what our brand does. Who we are or what we stand for.

ACCOUNT: Let's have a zoom. 

ASS'T ACCOUNT: I'll set up a call for Thursday next.

PLANNER: Let's make sure we talk about NFTs on that call.

PM: Are we scoped for that?

INTERN: Ocean plastic.

TECHNOLOGIST: We need to add some hours for Blockchain.

SR. CREATIVE: We'll have an anthem, some directors' reels and a ton of print.

ACCOUNT: The client hasn't run print since 2002.

SR. CREATIVE: But it will help define them.

MEDIA: We have some sponsorships with value-added quarter pages.

INTERN: The refugee crisis.

JR. CREATIVE: Metaverse. We'll build a storefront.

TECHNOLOGIST: They're on Drupal.

PM: Scrum.

ACCOUNT: We're running hot.

SR. CREATIVE: The CCO wants everyone involved. We have to make something we can enter in Cannes.

JR. CREATIVE: (LAUGHING) Look! This is Ann as an avatar!

SR. CREATIVE: That's fucking great.

INTERN: Systemic racism.

PRODUCER: Just spoke to Smuggler! They want in.

SR. CREATIVE: What about Noam?

ACCOUNT: We can afford Noam, or Lance.

JR. CREATIVE: Even if we choose a song by the Stones?

PLANNING: No one's used the Stones for an NFT yet.

PM: This is coming together.

ACCOUNT: But we're still running a little hot.

CCO: We've got some boards coming in from the offices in Mumbai and Singapore.

SR. CREATIVE: Fuckin' awesome.

TECHNOLOGIST: We're working on a CMS. We'll be ready three months after the TV breaks.

MEDIA: It needs to work in six seconds.

INTERN: Global warming.

PRODUCER: We'll shoot anamorphically and one to one.

SR. CREATIVE: We need a really good DP.

PRODUCER: We've got the guy who did the Betty White tribute.

HR: We need to make sure we bid diverse production talent. And that the shoot is carbon-neutral.

PRODUCER: Why don't you just handcuff me from the start?

ACCOUNT: Cool it. There's no "i" in team.

PLANNING: Actually, we'll be dubbing this in French. The French word for team is "equipe." That has an "i." In Finnish, the word team is "tiimi."

JR. PLANNER: That's three "i's" in team.

SR. CREATIVE: Fuck a duck.

SR. ACCOUNT: Lunch!