Patent number 588388599-08-09987485820488.

This weekend I decided the time was ripe to solve a problem that confronts us all. That is, the proliferation of meetings that accomplish nothing except to rob you of the time you need to actually do your job.

I am a tinkerer by nature. I once turned a broken can-opener into a workable microwave oven. Another time I took the parts from an old Waring blendor and constructed a small drone helicopter. That drone was eventually bought by Northrup-Grumman, marked up approximately one-million percent and sold to the Defense Department and a number of our enemies at extortionate profits.

But back to this weekend. Thinking about the inane, insidious, and invidious meetings we are forced to attend, I took apart my TiVO and fiddled around with it for about an hour. Voila. Behold the MeVO.

The MeVO condenses a 60-minute meeting into 11 minutes. It completely edits out everything Brad, Eliot and Marsha have to say because they've never really do anything but posture.

In other words, the MeVO allows you to (in the words of the tagline I've created) "Zap the crap."

Call me. I have a bunch in the trunk of my 1974 Impala. And I'll set you up at a good price.