Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Some Olympian suggestions.

Listening to NPR this morning and reading the New York Times, it's just occurred to me that we in the West are going about this anti-terrorism thing all wrong. We could fix the entire problem with just a slight change of perspective. So, here's what I propose:

Dear 2008 Beijing Olympic Committee:

I know the games are less than a year away and so suggesting a new competition will likely meet with your derision but that said, I feel this is an idea whose time has come. Let's make car-bombing an Olympic sport.

There are certainly enough nations "practicing" now, and perhaps if we make car bombing official--with rules, provisos, codicils and regulations, we will be able to exercise a bit more control over it. Let's make car-bombing a demonstration sport in 2008. Iraq, Afghanistan, Algeria, Spain, Pakistan, Northern Ireland and a few other nations already have strong squads. None of those nations do well in traditional sports like swimming and running, so perhaps this is a chance for more egalitarian medal representation.

If car-bombing succeeds, I suggest another sport, though it's possible that only the good ol' USA will be able to send a squad: Mall Shooting.


Tore Claesson said...

you forgot school shooting.

Laura said...

Also forgot suicide bombing. Country rep gets the gold as the participant goes to a higher authority.