Monday, October 16, 2017

Nobody asked me playoffs edition.

Nobody asked me but….is my occasional tribute to the great New York sportswriter, and all-around raconteur, Jimmy Cannon, who, when he had nothing to write about on the sporting scene, would pen one of these.

Nobody asked me but….

…you’re better off not buying your next bottle of wine from a shop called “Grape Expectations.”

…you should follow the advice of Nelson Algren, who wrote, "Never play cards with a man called Doc.”

…or “eat at a place called Mom's.”

…Finally, “Never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own."

…I don’t know much about Nelson Algren, but those rules are good enough for me.

…Anyone who takes an online quiz—especially one on Facebook—has too much time on their hands.

…People were swimming at the beach yesterday.

…As if you need more proof for global warming.

…The major league baseball season as it is currently configured with three-rounds of playoffs is 30 games too long.

….That said, I’ll miss baseball when the season is over.

…I think the baseball season should start around tax day and end the first week of October.

…Does it ever occur to football fans that they’re cheering as the players get brain-damaged?

….I haven’t watched a single professional football down this year.

…Though I did listen to the last twenty minutes of Columbia’s overtime victory over Penn.

…Columbia has won more games this season than they did the entire time I was in college and grad school.

…If you read anything today, make it Charles Blow’s “Trump, Chieftain of Spite.”

….I may or may not be a workaholic, but I certainly hope Robert Mueller is one.

….I also hope he has a mean-streak a mile-wide.

….Those rotating ads behind home-plate during the ball game are disgusting.

…Advertising will perform better when we learn to give people space.

…You can say that about most relationships.

...Astros over the Yanks, in six. Dodgers over the Cubs, in five. Dodgers over Houston in the World Series in seven.

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