I run a purpose-driven brand, goddammit.

As CMO of Spoon ‘n’ Swoon, America’s largest maker of ready-2-eat tapioca pudding, I quickly came to realize that we do more than satisfy America’s burgeoning tapioca sweet-tooth. At Spoon ‘n’ Swoon our team truly comprehends our Mission. That is, to improve every STO (spoon-time occasion).

I have a Vision at Spoon ‘n’ Swoon. I want to elevate the PEO (pudding-eating opportunities) of all our Guests. I want to be an integral part of every tapioca journey, and bring those journeys to life for both new and existing Guests.

Further, through 360-integrated communications and a robust multi-pronged social strategy that will integrate Spoon ‘n’ Swoon into both the life and the lifestyles of our Guests, I am confident that we are going to transform the entire Tapioca category, all while inspiring people to live a healthy and active lifestyle.

The Tapioca category is poised for a time of dynamic growth and positive change.  Our commitment extends to our South American colleagues who harvest our non-GMO, organically-curated cassava and our dedicated workers who turn that cassava into the finest mass-market Tapioca in the world.

We are committed and inspired to help bring our workers and Guests a healthier, happier world that is energized by the infectious enthusiasm of Tapioca-lovers everywhere.

The love of Tapioca has to be about more than just pudding. To be a vital part of Gen X, Gen Y, Gen Z and Gen Asterisk, we will go beyond the customary and turn tapioca into a verb. Right now,   for instance, in the Tapioca-producing regions of the world we are erecting Tapioca Treehouses--building Tapiocaing places for the children of our Tapioca-workers to learn and play--to excite all our Guests and turn them into "Tapiovocates."

When a company leverages their business for social good, they are rewarded with more motivated teams and improved performance. What’s more, purpose offers excellent opportunities for collaborative partnerships and engaging storytelling. The secret to doing so is stakeholder buy-in and that’s best achieved by ensuring everyone knows how their work in Tapioca contributes to a higher purpose and creating the opportunity for them to experience the fulfillment from doing so.

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In which I go to the movies.

I don't like gore.

I don't like torture.

Or brutal fights.

I don't even like cursing on screen.

I'm old-fashioned in my tastes.

All that to say, before this weekend, I hadn't been to the movies since my younger daughter fairly dragged me to see the vaunted (but hugely disappointing) La La Land. (See "Umbrellas of Cherbourg" or "The Young Girls of Rochefort," both by Jaques Demy if you want something of this ilk.)

But this weekend, my wife dragged me to see Spike Lee's new joint: BlacKKKlansman.

We had seen Lee in conversation with Times' columnist Charles Blow at the Times Center two weeks earlier, and both Lee and Blow did a good job promoting the film. 

I knew I had to see it, and I wasn't disappointed.

Still, it will be hard to get me out to the movies again.

First off, the theatre itself, in one of New York's poshest neighborhoods was as ambient as a roach motel. Dirty, malodorous and sticky.

Second, we were besieged by asinine commercials before the show, mostly featuring winsome young things swaying back and forth and talking about downloading apps so you can get points to see more movies.

Then, the trailers came on.

Loud, violent, ugly and bombastic.

So far from anything I would potentially watch as to be ludicrous.

I guess here I am showing my age. I feel estranged from (and superior to) today's culture. Listening to this weekend's remembrances of John McCain and Leonard Bernstein only accentuated those feelings.

We, as a nation, are the sort that elects a dangerous know-nothing like Trump either because we are ignorant of our past, unwilling to learn of our present, or simply too lazy to vote.

I don't blame that on the movies, of course. They aren't really shaping our culture as much as they're shaped by it.

But I can't help but thinking it will be a good long time before I head out to the movies again.

And I don't think I'm missing anything.

Uncle Slappy's End-of-a-Long-Week Slap-of-the-Week.

I’m an entrepreneur, goddammit.

I’m an entrepreneur, goddammit.

I am disrupting disruption and interrupting interruption.

I am re-engineering, rethinking, re-reing the old modalities.

While you were still sleeping, I was turning tired business models upside-down. Then right-side-up again.

I found my paradigms and then shifted them.

Once they were shifted, I shifted them again.

No paradigm left unshifted, that’s my motto.

While you were not working, I was networking.

I’m an entrepreneur, goddammit.

I lean so far in, I'm practically leaning out.

I'm blogging, vlogging, and hogging the spotlight.

Making connections, advancing the ball and creating new products before my target is even aware of my old products.

I am agile, facile, every ile but fragile.

Because I’m an entrepreneur, goddammit.

I'm an influencer who influences influencers.

Even if I'm down with influenza.

I’m not just inventing. I’m inventing new ways to reinvent inventing.

I’m creating, recreating and procreating.

I make content that can be sound-bited, syndicated, repurposed, digitized and idolized.

I am purpose-driven, transparent and engagement-focused.

My reality is virtual, and augmented, and segmented.

I have conversations about brands. 

I put the consumer in charge.

I'm a global ambassador for global ambassadoring.

Lead, follow or get out of the way.

I’m an entrepreneur, goddammit.

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Myth-making.

I started reading Ingrid Rossellini's new book last night, "Know Thyself: Western Identity from Classical Greece to the Renaissance."  You can buy it here.

(And yes, Ingrid Rossellini is the daughter of the great director Roberto Rossellini and the great actress Ingrid Bergman.)

What got me last night was a quotation Bergman attributed to Joseph Campbell, but that the web attributes to a 4th Century Roman writer, Sallustius.

Regardless of who said it, it's worth spending a few moments thinking about.

"A myth is something that has never happened, and is happening all the time."

Chew on that for a few minutes.

Think about the stories we create for brands. Think about the stories we create for ourselves, as writers. Think about the universality of human nature, and the myriad things that are "happening all the time."

You don't need to spend much time reading advertising trade magazines or even your Linked In-feed, before you trip over someone blathering on about experience design, or user interface or some other mumbo-jumbo.

There are dozens of slide-shows clanking around cyberspace with some dweeb talking about new media landscapes, empowered consumers, and people seeking out cheaply produced content, that will somehow, magically get passed along and induce sales.

I think we spend too much time thinking about how much in the world has changed. And not enough time thinking about how much the world hasn't changed.

We sprint after the ephemeral and transitory to the exclusion of universal truths.

Let's fuck everything we do in advertising, save for one criterion.

Let's asks ourselves if we've scratched a universal itch. If we've created something that someone will notice--and care about.