Agency Lie, a relentless prevarication.

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Wednesday Morning Stir

October 2, 2019 - 10:00 AM Comment

A roundup of industry news from around the web.

-Cindy Gallop said something.

-Gary Vaynerchuk said something.

-Cindy Gallop said something else.

-Gary Vaynerchuk sent out a badly drawn cartoon of himself saying something.

-Cindy Gallop blew something up.

-Gary Vaynerchuk sent out a badly shot video of himself saying something.

-Cindy Gallop blew something else up.

-Gary Vaynerchuk said something empty and obvious.

-Gary Vaynerchuk sent out a post thanking people for reading his posts.

-Gary Vaynerchuk is speaking somewhere.

-Final score: Gary Vaynerchuk, 7. Cindy Gallop, 4.

-Burger King employees flame-broil over 11,725 McDonald’s  employees inflicting third-degree burns in an “advertising stunt gone wild.”

-Saran Wrap plastic wrap agrees to end the use of all plastic by 2477.

-Airwick Air Freshener plans to end the use of air by 2051.

-Three Holding Companies propose a new agency model that no longer receives compensation for work, except for senior management.

-New timesheet system activated through haptic employee flogging.

-Womnipubliconinter Holding Company renames itself: Overhead.

-Agency art director shows up before 11.

-Agency copywriter has infarction.

-Assistant Account Exec writes entire email without misusing there, their and they’re.

-Agency wireless network has no outages two consecutive hours. Outages will be back in service Tuesday says agency spokesperson. “There’s no excuse for an outage outage.”

-New awards show celebrating dysfunctional Agency infrastructure, The Outies, attracts thousands of early entrants.

-When asked for comment, an Outie spokesman was “out.”

-New York Agency wins coveted Grand Outie recognizing malfunctioning printers and Sustaining Outie for consistently non-working wireless.

-Employee working from home caught working.  

-Sorrell: S4’s goal “We will be a Holding Company for Holding Companies that hold other Holding Companies.”