Tuesday, August 13, 2019

I have a side hustle, goddammit.




Dude, Bro, Dude-bro, Brah, 

Take it from me, these days, if you want to change the world, if you want to do something big, stop global warming, remove plastic from the oceans, save the Norwegian fur-bellied marmoset, or even if you just want to someday stop working for the man, even if the man is a woman, dude, bro, dude-bro, brah, you need yourself a side hustle.

Dude-bro, I spend so much time on my side hustle because side-hustling is all about being an entrepreneur. It's about doing what you love, loving what you do and changing the world and having a purpose. 

I have a side hustle dude-bro for all those reasons but mostly because I love my craft and want to make a difference to all those makers in maker-spaces with the craft I love in the difference-making craft space that lets me make a difference doing the things I love as a side hustle.

Dude-bro, my side hustle is how I hack life. Dude.

Hacking life with a side hustle is not about following a 29-step business plan in a glossy powerpoint. No, bro-dude it's about gathering your rose-bud-weisers while ye can and returning those cans for a five-cent deposit, that's what it's about. 

It's about the hustle, the tussle and the muscles in all your corpuscles to make a difference doing the side hustle.

I do so much on my side, dude-bro, bro-dude, that the bottoms of my shoes aren't even scuffed yet, dude-bro, because I'M ON MY SIDE, dude. 

One year, dude-bro, I did my side-hustle so hard it became my hustle hustle so I switched my hustle hustle to become my side hustle and then I crushed that and then before I know it, I had two side hustles. A left side hustle. And a right side hustle.

Dude.

Then I said to myself, what about a front side hustle and a back side hustle, and dude, hustling isn't about the money, dude, sleeping just two hours a week is possible because you're doing what you do and you're making a difference, dude-bro. And you love it, douche-bro, because it's your side hustle and you're crushing it.

One year, bro-dude, I made $37 million from my side hustle and I'm like dude-bro, so what I started with $50 million, $37 million is real money. But dude-dah, the side hustle isn't about making money. No doo-bee-doo-be-do.

It's about doing what you love. Because when you do what you love, you CRUSH it and when you CRUSH it, zippity doo dah, it's about crushing the side hustle and that's all that matters. Taking what you love and crushing it as a side hustle.

The other day I got into my apartment about three in the morning. I was going to eat dinner (two-minutes) shower (one-minute) and take a three-minute nap.

Dude-dude, when you're crushing your side hustle, you crush it. You don't get tired, you don't get hungry and if you do stink, you're crushing it too hard to notice. 


Dude, just at that moment when I'm in the kitchen getting my dinner, dude-bro, I see a cockroach. That cockroach was hustling across the expensive be-spoke Italian tile that I can afford because my side-hustles have side-hustles, and dude, I saw that cockroach, dude-bro, and I CRUSHED it.

Bro-dude, I have a side hustle goddammit. And lead, hustle, or get out of the way. Because dude-crude, it's all about the side hustle and hustling on your side.

Because like me, dude bro, get your side a side hustle and let it ride on your side, don't be snide and say you tried. You need a side hustle!


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