Thursday, September 3, 2009

An immodest proposal.

The agency at which I am now working has what's known as open-plan seating. Though this is a large agency (I think it might be New York's largest) there are, I'm told but three private offices--you know, a traditional sanctum sanctorum with a door and all that chazarai.

I'm told that open-plan arrangements improve group cohesion, collaboration, community, and work flow. And that improvements on those fronts more than offset having to deal with an assistant fighting with a phone rep from J. Crew because she wanted white with red stripes and the red stripes she got were more maroon than the picture online indicated.

In any event, if open-plan is so efficacious, why stop at offices? Why do we insist on having bathrooms closed off by something as odious as doors. Why do we have stalls? Why do we have bathrooms at all? Why why why.

What I'm proposing is that we sprinkle around the office 'shitting stations', 'defecation depots,' 'tinkle terminals' at which we can further connect and collaborate, communicate and bond with our colleagues.

As my friends at Wieden are apt to say, "Just Doody It."


Teenie said...

Try an open-plan office with coworkers who like the phone's nifty hands-free option. Please Lord, let me never have to go back to that again.

geo said...

I removed the previous comment because it was in Cyrillic and I reckoned it might be spam.

jeaves said...

I am amazed at the open concept Mother London or New York uses. Everyone at a big long table, and every couple months someone outside the agency determines the sitting arrangement. You then carry your laptop and roll your standardized file drawer to your next station.

I can see this being handy for downsizing. Play musical chairs... when the music stops just remove one chair and watch the scramble.