Tuesday, January 27, 2009

April is the cruelest moth.

Oh, I could make this post--pursuant to my post yesterday about "boarders" and as The Ad Contrarian pointed out "quantifiable metrics." But I won't. Exacting as I am, I am a lousy proofreader. I do, however, have quite an ear for a mirthful malaprop or even the occasional Spoonerism.

Speaking of Spooner and his isms, my favorite is "he rode down the street on a well-boiled icicle." Here are two others: "Is it kisstomary to cuss the bride?"
"The Lord is a shoving leopard."

This isn't a Spoonerism, but to my mind it's even better, since it is attributed to Groucho: "Time flies like and arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."

No point in this post.
Except this little one.
I hope I made you laugh.
I could do worse.

PS. I just heard on NPR that companies are cutting jobs via "layoffs and attrition." And I said to my wife, "how else would you cut jobs," and she sagely replied (she is older and wiser than I) "kill people."


Tore Claesson said...

Long, long ago in Scandinavia they brought the old and seemingly useless to the "├Ąttestupa", a cliff, pushed them over, and voila, one less feed.

Tore Claesson said...

..to feed.

Teenie said...

In parts of Africa, they bring the elderly out to the woods and leave them there.

Cheers for The Wastelands. Never figured out what the dang poem was supposed to be about, but it sure is eerily pretty to read.

Anonymous said...

From the brochure in the box for a sinus doohickey I bought on the weekend:

"I love this product! I will buy one for all my friends who can't breathe at Christmas."

theschwartex said...

You did make me laugh. But your wife made me laugh harder.